The pentagon recently found it had too many generals and offered an
early retirement bonus. They promised any general who retired straight
away, his full annually benefits PLUS $10,000.00 for every inch measured
in a straight line along the retiring general's body between two points
he chose. (Something Congress came up with!)
The first general accepted. He asked the pension man to measure from the
top of his head to the tip of his toes. 6 feet. He walked out with a check
of $720,000.00.
The second general asked them to measure from the tip of his outstretched
hands to his toes. 8 feet. He walked out with a check for $960,000.00.
Meantime, the first general had tipped off the third. When he was asked
where to measure, he told the pension man. "From the tip of my penis to
the tip of my balls." The pension man said that would be fine but he'd
better get the Medical Officer to do the measuring.
The Medical Officer attended and asked the general to drop 'em. He did.
The Medical Officer placed the tape on the tip of the general's penis and
began to work back. "My God!" he said, 'where are your balls?" The general
replied, "in Vietnam."
